Rest... I needed rest...
Last week my family and I took our first real vacation in almost 2 years. I say real, because we were actually gone more than just a couple days and I wasn't dealing with a lot of stress. It was great. I didn't realize exactly how much I needed it till today.
Today I have been thinking a lot about how I have been feeling over the last year. While I moved from a time that was incredibly draining physically, emotionally, and spiritually, I still feel like I am in a state of discontent.
I am content with where I am in my job. I am content with how we are growing as a family and for the first time in a long time really living as a family. My relationship with my wife is consistently getting closer, just as God designed it to be. I am content with a lot of things in my life. I enjoy a lot of things in my life. However, there is still something that I feel is not right.
I know life is not all about feelings, but I also know that God created us with an intuition to know when something is wrong. He creates a stirring in our soul, mind, and heart that makes us yearn for something more.
I didn't feel this while on vacation. I felt refreshed. I felt relieved. I felt free.
As I look at it, I can see how God used our vacation to show me a few things and to give me what I needed, even when I didn't know I needed it. It is amazing at how He takes care of us and how unfortunately we often don't see it till after it is over.
So here I am today, back to the same ol' thing that I was doing before vacation. Feeling the same way. Knowing that God has something for me and that He doesn't want me to be too comfortable in the place that I am. I can have peace in that.
While God doesn't have to prove Himself ever to us, He does time and time again.
Pray also for me, that whenever I speak, words may be given me so that I will fearlessly make known the mystery of the gospel, for which I am an ambassador in chains. Pray that I may declare it fearlessly, as I should. Ephesians 6:19-20 NIV