Shortly after graduating college, our son Noah was born. At that time, I was looking for a full time job, and Marcey had a full time job. We decided that since her job paid decent that after her maternity leave I would continue to stay home with Noah until I found a full time job that could replace her income. I was working part time at Office Depot, but really I wasn’t providing for my family. It was a hard place to be in.
I love being home with Noah and being able to spend time with him those first months, but something just wasn’t right. Something inside me felt off and like I was doing something wrong. I never really completely understood it till late last week when I heard a pastor speak on the role of a husband and father.
The pastor said that was for husbands and fathers, we are called to provide for our families. To me, having lived that life, it makes perfect sense. I wasn’t really providing for my family and in turn my faith suffered. My life suffered. Thanks be to God that not long after that period in my life God granted me a full time job that was able to replace Marcey’s income.
She continued to work for a few weeks while the whole insurance thing worked itself out so we temporarily we put Noah in daycare. I know it was hard on Marcey to do so, but we had a wonderful daycare provider (She only had Noah and one other kid plus her own) and loved him like her own. I don’t think we could have asked for anyone better at that point in our lives.
After about a year or so of that, things changed and Marcey went back to work for a while. We again put Noah in the same daycare as we knew he was genuinely loved there. It wasn't long before I got a raise and we decided we wanted Marcey to be able to stay home with Noah. Marcey staying home to be with our kids has always been challenging in some ways. However, I wouldn’t have it any other way.
This past week I have been listening to “Bringing Up Boys” by James Dobson and “Real Marriage by Mark Driscoll. Between those two books I have been able to see exactly why God planned for our lives to be this way. Both books shared time and time again how God designed women to work at home and car for the children (Titus 2:5). Dobson explained how important it is for women to do such things for child development reasons and Driscoll explained how it can actually be considered a sin for a man to force his wife to work rather than letting her stay home with the children. They both explained due to the fact that there is sin in our world this may not always be possible, (IE single mothers) but it is the way God designed humanity.
Anyway, back to my point. I have always been happy with our decision to do whatever it takes to let Marcey stay home with the kids. I know she has that desire and she wants what is best for them. She works hard to train them, teach them, nurture them, and love on them. It has been one of the best decisions, I think, we have ever made. For me, this has all been confirmed this week through those two books. As I listen to them being read it just echoes what Marcey has been telling me for so long and I am proud to call her my wife and the mother of my children.
It is amazing to me that sometimes God comes in to confirm you are doing things right even when you aren’t questioning it, for no other reason than to remind you that He is still there and has everything in control.